If we picture ourselves as a house, we can imagine the different relational spaces as rooms we inhabit. Reflection on these can reveal how connected and how at home we really are in ourselves.
Within us may be areas that are full of light, while others may be closed off to ourselves and to others. These rooms are of differing sizes depending on the gravity we have given them. We may only occasionally feel able to show some of them to others. For example, what does the room of our body feel like? Are we satisfied and at peace, or are we carrying painful things in relation to our bodies? How comfortable are we with our mind space? Do we engage positively and receive life from our thoughts, or do we have parts that disturb and frighten us? In the area of our emotions how do we operate? Are we able to articulate and work with how we feel? Do we escape from feelings that distress us, selecting only those we like? And, how do we live in the room of our memories? Does our past feel heavy, or is it light in our hearts? Is imagining our future inviting or does it frighten us? Are we at home in the room of our sexuality? Is this an open space, or is it fraught with hurts and uncertainty?
Many fear and run from the difficult spaces they discover. Yet, the invitation is to become aware of, and to work with, our stuck spaces if we want to find an inner union. We cannot look to others to give us the intimacy we long for – we need to go first into our own scary places to find it. Through traumas we have separated, and lost connection with ourselves. As we acknowledge and deal with our wounds, we start to reintegrate and reconnect every part. This makes us into people others feel safe with as they too are longing to be at home in themselves.
So, as we courageously begin to open the windows in those dark inner rooms to God’s healing light, we can become more and more at home in our own space. Then, we can allow others to come into those rooms too. For as we love all of our own reality, we can begin to accept others more fully and unconditionally.