If we believe that we are not enough we give this lie power over us. When our defenses are down, and we’ve lost sight of our worth in God’s eyes, we’re particularly vulnerable to shame.
Shame is different from guilt. Guilt says, “You’ve made a mistake,” but shame says, “You are a mistake. You are not okay.” Words and experiences that feed our shame stay with us for years. Is there shame in how clever or stupid we perceive ourselves to be? When we look at our bodies do we feel ugly or undesirable? Have we come to believe that in our relationships we are just not enough? Do we carry shame about our past, our background, our family secrets? When we compare ourselves to others do we wonder if we’ve achieved enough?
We can choose to take hold of words and experiences that healed us of shame
We need to listen to the voices that are speaking in our mind, body, heart soul and spirit. What is stopping us from truly being ourselves?
“I am very much the product of both my parents’ attitudes to life. My Babbo, for example, grew up poor and would cross town to save 2c on a purchase. But my Mamma would buy the best thing, even if it was more expensive. I can see both these tendencies in me when I spend.”
“As an immigrant family in the 1950’s being self-sufficient was a strong life attitude. We learnt not to be dependent on some contractor who might rip us off. These attitudes are still very much who I am today.” – SergioContinue reading Revealing attitudes for the sake of inner growth→
Shame is a punch to stomach; it blinds us to the truth, it seeks to isolate us. As we walk with God and others who love us, we receive His healing.
It is our ongoing life work to become aware of the different beliefs we carry in each part of ourselves – in our mind, body, heart, soul and spirit – because it is from out of our beliefs that our behaviour comes.
Shame, something we are all so familiar with, distorts what we believe to be the truth about ourselves. As a very powerful social manipulator, it is often used to get people to comply, to put others in their place and to adjust their behaviour. But shaming casts a shadow across our feelings of self-worth and leaves us feeling less, with doubt that we are enough. Continue reading Shame→
Listening to what our beliefs say in each area of our being
Each of us behaves very differently within the same experience. This is because we each interpret life through our ‘normal’ filter, our inner belief systems. As we relate to each other we may choose to try to make our norm happen over and over or else we can be touched and changed by each situation. Continue reading Beliefs We Hold→
Ridding ourselves of problematic emotions is not the answer. Like a learner driver, we can learn to manage the powerful thrusts we experience.
Ridding ourselves of problematic emotions
Often people will think of their anxiety, fear and anger just as problematic, negative emotions. They are feelings that they’d prefer to get rid of. However, these strong emotions are needed by us in order to live each day. All three are engineered into our bodies.
It is possible to manage our emotions
What we need is to learn how to manage these emotions because if they do things in us that we can’t control they do cause big problems and harm. Like learning to drive a car we need time to learn how to engage these feelings, to find ways to stop them from making us jerk or stall so we can move more smoothly through life. Continue reading Learning to Manage Problematic Emotions→
Every venture of life involves our moving from a known reality and security to an unknown one over which we don’t have control. This always causes apprehension to rise in us as this movement involves taking a risk – whether it is in learning a new skill, being in a relationship, having faith in God, doing your work, going on a new adventure, even just living. But if we don’t take the risk we will lose ourselves. Continue reading Anxiety is the driver pushing us forward to learn, grow, change→
We all know the feelings we got as we played hide and seek, and waited to be found. Games we play all carry levels of anxiety, as do all other creative risks we take in life. Continue reading Find me if you can!→
We all know the freedom with which a child draws something. Before knowing others judgement young children have no belief that what they create is somehow not okay.
Follow the formation of that same child into their school years and we see them change in their confident spontaneity. They start believing that they can’t draw. In an atmosphere of unrealistic expectations they feel unsafe to freely create and experience heightened anxiety when asked to perform. Continue reading Be→
