All posts by Sergio Milandri

Diving Deep

Most of the time we sail through life unaware of the unseen world beneath us. From time to time, evidence of this reality breaks through the surface and we are reminded of its existence. Only if we dive below, do we discover that there’s hidden beauty and fear – and there’s always more than we could have known, waiting to be explored. We sense that the seen and the unseen worlds are not separated, but that they depend on each other – for what happens in the one affects the other, and together form part of a larger whole. Similarly, as we explore and discover unseen realities of ourselves, we will be enlarged, if we don’t look just for what we want to see, or listen for only what we expect to hear.
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Inner Dialogue – Inner Critic or Inner Freedom

If we could take a mirror and go into all our inner world, what would we notice? Would we see someone who needs others’ permission to be, or who lets someone else define the moment for us? Do we see someone who is making life-giving choices, who is taking authority over the moments each of us are given?
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Root-bound?

God is always inviting us into places of greater openness and trust in Him. Even though we do not know what the future holds, He does. We can keep ourselves ‘small’ and controlled, and so miss His greater purpose for us – to become our fullest selves. His expansive call is, ‘Choose Life!’, for He knows how fear can lock us down. We so need to hold onto the way He sees us because the limited way we have been known is not nearly the whole picture. He, like any gardener, wants to take us out of our restricting container of beliefs and expectations and plant us so that we can really thrive.  Continue reading Root-bound?

Finding freedom through forgiveness

Sometimes our hardest task is to release those who have hurt us. Yet, it is one of the most profound aspects of being a life giver. We may have said the words, “I forgive you.”, but still feel resentment in our hearts. Events can have an immense afterlife and we can can hold onto them in order to hurt back in some way later.
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Open to surprise

Too seldom do we enter the moment open to whatever surprises there are for us. Instead, we often flood it with the baggage we are carrying from our past. Like in the film, ‘The Mission’, we drag along a sack of dead-weight expectations. In this way we can easily lose the moment and end up simply repeating the way we live our lives. We can also miss it if we always feel we have to have something to show, or if we over- or under-manage it. Our commitment to being real, teachable, and flexible in each moment is so important.
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“Where does it hurt?” Healing our wounds in order to live more fully

Just as we have a body, we have an inner self. There are similarities between our physical and our unseen parts. If we reflect on our body and how we care for it, we can learn a lot about about how to tend to our inner ‘body’. Just as we eat well and exercise to keep healthy, so too we nurture and love our inner self.
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This moment: God’s unfolding gift

Far too easily we move out of the moment. We can contaminate it and forever lose it when we allow our emotions around our past experiences to define what’s happening now. When we give in to anxiety, for example, allowing it to control us, it simply increases. But as it grows it can overwhelm us. Similarly, if we let our experiences of fear define us, we can easily fill our days with it.
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My Life is Now

If we are distracted and so lose this moment, we have lost it forever. If we are busy focusing on other things that pull us away from the now, we are actually losing our lives. Are we becoming more aware of what we bring to the moment, that we often load it with expectations leaving little space for the unknown? Are we in touch with what’s going on internally? Our moods indeed can affect how open we are and we can allow them to define what happens. Continue reading My Life is Now

Relationships need our ongoing work

All too often we are unaware that this is the only moment we are alive. Much of our lives can be reduced to trivialities. We can easily forget that relationships don’t ‘just happen’, but that they need work in order to be life-giving. A farmer can’t just sit all day on his stoep and dream about a good harvest. Fruitfulness will take his ongoing effort.

God has made all of us creatures of need. Our need (not neediness) is something beautiful, something that makes us alive. As we accept this by meeting our own and others’ needs appropriately we find our joy and fulfilment. Continue reading Relationships need our ongoing work

Life happens as we truly connect with others

Many things can distract us from really connecting with others. We may be tempted to have many, and different experiences, yet remain shallow in our human connections. If we give ourselves too much choice, wanting to have it all, we will lose discernment for what we really are here for. We need to become aware of what we bring to our interactive spaces, of how present we really are, for if we are not giving life to another, we actually are taking it from them. Do we nourish and satisfy others through our connections? We need to develop relational intuition where we stop judging people by externals and develop a sense for invisible things – to be aware of when there are facades between us, of when we are not being real. Continue reading Life happens as we truly connect with others